On a more family oriented note...

Sam was not in my good graces this weekend. I was so disappointed in him. The kids Halloween candy has been sitting in a bag in the corner of the kitchen since Halloween. I have not been stingy with it and was actually starting to question my parenting in letting them gorge themselves on candy ad infinitum. But I figured what the heck they are only young once. The rule has ALWAYS been that they ask before they take and no, my answer wasn't always "go ahead."

Friday while preparing dinner (back to the candy) I heard a distinct rustle of candy wrapper and turned just to see Sam hightailing it down the hall as quick as his little feet would carry him. I called him back and demanded to know what was in his hand.

"Nothing," he countered.

So I asked again. On the third try my little candy pilferer revealed the bag of nibs hidden behind his back. He got a time-out - for lying. For taking the candy (which was community property!!) without asking I told him that the remaining candy was now ceded to Kamryn. I gathered it up at this point and put it where only the Mom can get at it. There was much crying and carrying on and begging for forgiveness (always is with Sam). I was mad but thought the incident was done with until bedtime when Kamryn informed me there was "something orange all over the light switch in the bathroom." Sam is a really cute kid. A master criminal - not so much. The orange stuff was quite obvious to me Doritos dust (he LOVES Doritos). He was already in bed. I went in and asked him if he'd had any other candy without asking. He swore to me up and down that he had not. I warned him that if he lied to me again the would not get to attend the birthday party he was invited to the next day. He was very earnest and believable. I didn't believe him ... quite. It also crossed my mind that he might be innocent and I felt a little guilty as I really laid into him. I looked in the trash in his room - did a cursory check and left. Guilt over accusing my innocent little moppet growing ever stronger. Then I went into the bathroom to clean up the orange dust.

Cue dramatic music...

There was a washcloth on the counter just covered in orange chip yuck (I do not share Sam's love of Doritos).

Hmmmm....

When I went to toss the paper towel I had grabbed to wipe down the wall I noticed a carefully arranged kleenex covering the top of the trash. Now my kids can barely get a kleenex in the trash on the best of days. This one was laid out as if the trash was cold and needed to be tucked in. I lifted the kleenex and the trash was FULL of empty candy wrappers. Oh rockets went off! I was soooooo very mad and so very disappointed in him.

Yes, he lost the party. I felt it was a harsh punishment (at times, at times not so much) but I had already promised it (note to self: must refine interviewing techniques) and I didn't feel that I should go back on my promise. And he got to spend a delightful Saturday with me at all times. He was either holding my hand or holding on to my clothing if my hands were busy. If I was working in the kitchen he was sitting in the corner watching. He learned (I hope) that if I can't trust him he will have no freedom whatsoever. We went out for dinner as a family and he sat and watched the three of us eat the complimentary chips before dinner. He had none. He lost TV for the weekend. On Sunday we visited the little boy who's party he had missed to deliver the birthday present and apologize. He pranced out of party-boy's house delighted to have received a grab bag - and was shocked and horribly upset when I grabbed it. We dropped him off with his grandparents for the evening (so I could get to my interview nice and early this morning) and he thought he would get sympathy there. Oh did he misread his grandparents. Not a pleasant weekend for any of us.

I so hope he learned something from all this. Sadly, I'm thinking not.

The big comment EVERY ONE makes about Sam is his inability to accept responsibility for his actions. He just doesn't get it. It's always someone else's fault. Someone always hates him (I took his grab bag because I don't like him anymore - not because he was being punished for lying and stealing). It's never fair. Sigh.

I am a little worried.