Let's worry over nothing

I'm so used to reassuring parents worried that their child is in x percentile that percentiles don't mean anything compared to anyone else (that percentiles only matter when compared to your child's own growth). I never expected to have a problem with one of my kids.

We just got back from Kamryn's physical.

You know in hindsight I did notice that something was up but if you're not looking for trouble you don't really see it. It seems to me that while Kamryn was one of the bigger kids when she started school at 4 - her classmates grew and she did not. Seriously she went from the back row to the front in the photos. I thought it was a quirky aside.

Her doctor doesn't think its that quirky. She reassured me that Kamryn is growing just not as fast as she was in the past and this is cause for some concern. Seems Kamryn has dropped from the 67 percentile for weight to the 53! She gained 3 lbs over the year (I thought this was normal - and was stunned to realize its not). Her height is marginally better - only having dropped off the curve by about 8 points (63 to 55).

The doctor isn't panicking - she wants us to make snacks more readily available and to see that Kamryn drinks less milk (so she's not filling up on milk which I'm pretty certain she isn't). We need to go back in 6 months for a height/weight check. She also took blood to check her thyroid. Really, I look at Kamryn and I don't see any real change (duh! that's cause there hasn't been any!) We've always attributed the fact that Sam is rapidly catching up to her size wise to the fact that he's so tall; never thought her own growth could be suspect. She's not a skinny kid (but then again she never has been) nor is she a particularly fluffy one but that's not the point.

I'm just trying not to worry.

25 things about me

I'm bored and there is nothing on TV so I figured I'd make a list that I've been too lazy to do before now. I only go halfway done because I've been very honest and its actually rather hard. I'll finish it another day... maybe.

1. I hate the telephone. I get anxious when I have to call someone. I don’t like answering the phone and avoid it at all costs. I know this is weird.

2. I’m a rule follower – to my detriment. I’m just not a go with the flow kind of gal. People who are not annoy me (I feel like they are somehow cheating me).

3. I really like to play golf. I don’t care in the slightest if I suck. This is good because I do indeed suck.

4. I love thunderstorms – BIG ones. I’m always disappointed when we get a thunderstorm weather warning without the storm. Rain though – sucks.

5. I spend a great deal of time wondering if I’m “good” enough ... at EVERYTHING (and feeling inadequate). Perhaps I should be in therapy.

6. I’m a planner. I love planning activities: doing research making lists, schedules etc.

7. I’m a medical junkie. With a bigger brain I think I would have been a physician. I like to read/learn about diseases and medical conditions. I remember what I read.

8. I hate it when a good book comes to an end. I’m also a rather quick reader no matter how hard I try to slow down to savour a good story. I know it’s not great literature but the end of the Harry Potter series made me sad. I did not feel equally saddened by the end of Twilight. lol I wish Audrey Niffenegger would write another book.

9. Although I love reading with my kids (and will continue to do so... bring on the Hobbit), I’m really looking forward to the day when I can ask the kids to grab a book and sit and read quietly while I do the same. We’re getting there. Slowly.

10. I wish I were a better athlete. I like the endorphins brought about by exercise but I can’t handle the pain you need to endure to experience them. I would really like to be a runner. It’s not going to happen.

11. I don’t know how to make friends. I freak out and hide. I think its all tied to the “good enough” thing. If you want to be friends with me you have to work really hard initially because when you’re not looking I’m secretly panicking that I’m messing things up.

12. I prattle on WAY too much. People probably don’t realize this but I know this (and that its not a desirable character trait). I have tried to change since I was a small child (and used to get regularly punished for it). I’ve given up.

Rain, Rain, GO AWAY!

I wonder how much lumber it would take to build an ark and if the credit limit on our Home Depot card would cover it.

I'm going to talk about the weather. Oscar Wilde may have dismissed talk about the weather as "the last refuge of the unimaginative," so call me unimaginative but this really sucks.

I l know there are parts of the world dealing with real weather problems and this is by no means a real problem (for me a non-farmer, the farmers here are in deep trouble). That doesn't stop it from being a major drag. More so if you're 7 and 5 and supposed to be outdoors 24/7 having the summer of your life. The kids are in the basement right now. In the heart of summer vacation and as nice a basement as it is, how depressing is that?

It is not raining at this very moment - alleluia! However, we began the day with thunderstorms and it is dark enough right now that all the lights in the house need to be on so more rain isn't far off. Oops I lied. It is indeed pouring - I just didn't realize it.

It rains every bleeping day. Sometimes a little, sometimes a lot. Normally a lot. It's always "about to rain." Which makes activities difficult to schedule and disappointments (as promised excursions get cancelled when the heavens open up) many. On Friday the city took the rare measure (further research shows its not all that rare - they've done it 4 times this season; it just never affected us before this weekend) of closing all sports fields until further notice. The hope is to open them tomorrow but when they were shut down on Friday they were supposed to open today. But the rain hasn't stopped. Nor is it expected to. We're not a city that normally has big flooding problems but that was until the non-stop deluges started.

Sigh.

At least it has warmed up (although we are still on track to post the coldest July since they started record keeping in the 1930s). The beginning of the month was downright frigid. Now at least we're sitting in the mid-20s temperature wise. The unfortunate effect of the that though is that outside weather still sucks but we have to run the air conditioning to say comfortable indoors.

In an effort to make lemons out of lemonade - I'm considering starting an earwig raising business since my backyard now seems to be full of the little dampness loving creatures (ick!).

P.S. You see how in the forecast above it promises sun on Thursday and Saturday - it lies. When I got up this morning it promised sun tomorrow. Yesterday - that promise was for today. They are just playing with our minds. It's an illusion, a mirage. As we get close to the real day they move the sun just out of our reach. Gentle reader, you're not mistaken. I am having a weather breakdown. The rain is causing a psychosis.

Party Planning

So Sunday is my darling daughter's seventh birthday. Appropriately Kamryn is in 7th heaven. Party is tomorrow. It's got a Webkinz theme and she couldn't be more excited if she tried. Her mother? Less so. Somehow my seven-year old daughter is having a birthday party where there will be 4 boys in attendance and 3 girls (including her!).

Okay boys are a lot of work. They are VERY cute but they truly make me believe that cold fusion is possible. Something must keep them in energy. Little girls are so much easier. Even tomboys like mine. But we've never been a Princess Party single sex (well girl sex anyway) party kind of family though. The ratio of boys to girls would be even more lopsided but I had encouraged the invitation of a few excluded girls (more to reciprocate other invitations than because I wanted to influence who should be invited)

I'm proud of her. We got her a bicycle a few weeks ago as an early birthday present. It's red. I asked if she would prefer one that was pink or purple instead. She told me "I know I'm supposed to want a pink or purple one because I'm a girl but I want the red one. Is that all right?" This warms my mommy heart - one because she is her own person and secondly (conflictingly) because my bicycle is red and I think a little of it is that she wants to be like me.

I've told her how proud of her I am for not following the crowd but she just gives me this "you're nuts mom" look that I've come to expect whenever I tell her anything.

Meanwhile, however, I've got a party to plan - and little boys to entertain at a little girl's party (oh I hope they don't freak out when I suggest making braclets - they can give them to their Moms).

Pray for me. ;)

8 litres of Jam

What in the world am I going to do with 8 litres of jam? Oh and I STILL have raspberries left.

A raspberry story

So today we went strawberry, I mean raspberry picking. The intention was to pick strawberries but it seems the season ended without telling us. I'm good with raspberries though.

Let me preface the rest of this post with the point that I've never picked berries before.

So a little of this...

And some of this...

And I'm sure too much of this (look closely at Sam's mouth)...

And you end up with WAY to many of these.

I don't know what we were thinking when we picked that many. Well actually I do. It seemed criminal to leave tempting berries on the vine and walk away.

So I did a little of this...

And a little of this ...

And now we have a whole bunch of this...

As you can see we still have 4 litres left. I'll get to them tomorrow morning. Next time we will leave more berries behind for the birds.

I have a new backyard.

Cost me $658.00 -- the cost of a commercial grade gate for the chain link fence behind my house.

We have a typically tiny surburban backyard (at least for here/now. My parents yard is massive compared to this). Now the yard is a reasonable sized yard for a 41 year old. It's big enough for entertaining, hanging out, a nice little kitchen garden and its certainly enough lawn mowing but it's not so great when you're 5 and 7 and want to spread your wings a little. I'd estimate it's 40 x 60. However, just on the other side of our fence is a sizable school playground (3 or 4 acres). It includes a play structure, tennis courts, soccer field, baseball field, community centre, ice rink (in the winter) - kid heaven. We have access to the park/school via two paved paths each about five or six houses from ours. Not a far walk but not one we are willing to let the kids make on their own. Actually, I'd let them make it but once on the other side of the fence, if something happens, I'm too far away to get to them so I can't let them go on their own.

Friday we got a gate installed.

So here I sit, under a tree inside the gate watching the kids play outside the gate. I can see them well almost whereever they go - very few obstructions in the way. Kamryn has a walkie-talkie so I don't have to yell like a crazy woman to get her attention (Yelling would work but the neighbours would eventually get annoyed). Sam is NEVER far from Kamryn (he's glued to her). They've been riding their bikes without me having to panic that a car will come around the corner and cream them. They've been playing ball without me having to ask the neighbours to retrieve their ball a gazzillion times. In fact Sam has discovered the joys of a rubber ball and a brick wall. We've been flying kites (well I tried but I'm a disaster). We played with air rockets. I'm liking this.

Best $658.00 I ever spent.

P.S. There is on downside I just realized - significantly dirtier kids.

Good news

This evening eager to read a new book Kamryn exclaimed how she "loved to read" and proceeded to read it to me and her brother. It was in french not english but hey at 7 I couldn't have read to you in two languages so who am I kidding?

P.S. I'm hormonal and my family should probably go and stay at a hotel this week for their own safety.

Making some changes

As you can see.

Biggest change coming is that I'm changing the address. I hope to use www.onthewaytoafamily.blogspot.com if it's available in a week. I changed it tonight and then realized that any friends who do read won't be able to find me again and I would be sad. Since I don't know who actually is still around after my prolonged absences, I changed it back and then provided this warning.

So if you're reading and can't find me next week... or the week after ... give the new/old address a try.

You’ve got to be kidding me

I thought there was nothing I would hate more than toilet training. In a gazillion years I certainly never thought it would be teaching my kids to read. It is infuriating. I'm not blessed with those kids that everyone I come across seems to have " oh one day he just popped off the breast and picked up War and Peace and that was that." I'm pulling my hair out here.

I just gave up with Kamryn and sent her away (yes, I know my mother of the year award is in the mail). Our Waterloo: the word "glasses," which she insisted must be "gu-lay-sea". This followed a struggle with "legs." which had to be "l-ee-n-g" (where the "n" came from is beyond me). To top it off (in the middle of our 10 minute struggle with "glasses" I asked Sam for a word starting with and A (so we could at least get the "a" sound right) and he had no idea. Bad mom that I am I sent him away to (not really; I told him to go and ask his father. He did know he just couldn't be bothered. Arghhhhhhhhhhh!!!!)

I hate this. I took such joy in reading as a kid. This is sucking all the joy right out of it. Kamyrn can read just fine if she takes her time and thinks about how things sound but she doesn't. She sees the first letter of a word, thinks about what words could start with that letter and guesses; it doesn't matter a smidgen what the other letters in the word might be.

She does better in French (marginally) – definitely one of the weakest readers in her class at the end of 1^st grade (and unfortunately she knew it). Sam just couldn't care less. We've been working hard at reading and writing since school ended (she doesn't know we're working hard. It's my secret. I can see the progress in French; not so much in English which we've worked less on so I don't know what I'm so frustrated) but I'm not having any fun! Oddly the kids seem to still be enjoying themselves somewhat.

Okay maybe at the end of an active day is not the time to practice reading. It will get better when I'm off work (5 week vacation starts Friday!) and we can read mid-morning rather than late evening. Barring that, I'm sure there are some excellent vocational schools around (kidding of course ;)).

Cleaning Day

About 6 weeks ago I fired our cleaning service. Well not quite. I told them I wouldn't need them for the summer and I would call again in the Fall IF I needed them (this is because I'm a chicken).

It was a combination of factors – lack of money being the biggest one but in general I`ve been annoyed with the service I`ve been getting. At the end of May they were due to come for the bi-weekly cleaning. They didn't show. They didn't call. We just got home to a still dirty house. It was about the tenth time this had happened (sometimes we do got a call to apologize). They ALWAYS had an excuse and normally gave us some sort of discount for the inconvenience (at first this was spontaneous but more and more I had to ask to get any recompense). That last time they offered to come on the following Monday. I reluctantly said okay. Over the weekend my Father-in-law (who had been very ill for a very long time) took a turn for the worse and Daniel flew home. Cleaning crew came on Monday and cleaned. My Father-in-law died Monday afternoon. So that Thursday morning SUPER early the kids and I flew to join Daniel and stayed for 6 days. Since we hadn't really been in the house since it was cleaned I cancelled the regular cleaning the following Friday.

A week passed and the house was looking grubby so I cleaned. It wasn't that bad. The kids helped some. I KNOW I did a better job than the cleaning company on their best day. I contemplated how much we pay them. I contemplated what I could do with that cash. And I picked up the phone and fired them!

Okay so my plan quickly went south.

I had some utopian idea that my stay-at-home-Dad husband would clean a little everyday and we would live in spotless Nirvana. Un hunh. I cleaned like a madwoman every night after work. No one helped and I resented the hell out of both kids and husband. Hmmm... wasn`t this the reason we got the cleaning service in the first place? So ya – 2 weeks in and I wanted out. But I wasn't going to give up that easily. Time for my best passive-aggressive tactics. I made up worksheets (really I did!) listing what needed to be cleaned inside a two week period. I put a due date on the list and posted it on the fridge for all (read my darling husband) to read (and feel guilty as all the jobs were checked off by someone other than him). So two weeks went by and again I did everything by myself.

So I upped the aggressive and turned down the passive. I told him that I resented doing the job all on my own. He nodded and mumbled something. Two weeks went by ... I hired a divorce attorney – kidding. ;)

I changed tactics. Last Saturday we had "cleaning day." It was wonderful.

The WHOLE family contributed even the kids. It didn't take us a lot longer than the "professionals" I paid so dearly for (better even, the time I normally spent cleaning for the cleaning ladies folded into the overall clean).

The house is a gazillion times cleaner:

- I did all sorts of things they wouldn't normally do (things I didn't expect them to do - i.e. pulling out the stove to mop and sweep behind it).
- When dusting I tossed a bunch of clutter that I otherwise wouldn't even have noticed.
- I saw dirt that I normally wouldn't have noticed

The best thing is I think I taught my kids something. Yes, they have chores but Saturday I really put them to work. We're normally not at home when the cleaning crew comes - they truly had no idea what it takes to keep this place clean. If nothing else the lessons they are learning make the hassle worthwhile and have convinced me (at least for now) to stick it out (yes, my resolve was slipping). Daniel was grumpy by the end but its not like he could sit on the couch and read the paper while I cleaned around him. I was so much happier not having to do everything on my own.

Kamryn declared "cleaning day" boring but was soothed by the trip to MacDonald's for a post-cleaning feast. Yesterday she asked when it would be cleaning day again.

Perhaps because everyone worked so hard to clean the stupid house there seems to be a little extra effort being put forth to keep it clean (I've caught Daniel doing dishes twice now!)
I'm just revelling in a clean house that I didn't have to clean by myself. Hopefully we can keep this up.