Christmas

I opened my Christmas newsletter by telling everyone how blessed our family has been this year. Christmas was no exception. Kamryn and Sam had a wonderful time and you can’t watch kids enjoying Christmas and not have a whale of a time yourself. It really was an almost perfect holiday.

Daniel turned down all requests to work on Christmas Eve (right up until today, Dec 28th actually) to make sure he would be home with us all. My biggest complaint as a wife is I always spend holidays and times of crisis (i.e. the blackout of 2003) alone because he ALWAYS is called to work. It was so nice to have him home for the whole holiday (he normally works Christmas Eve and Boxing Day). So Christmas Eve we just hung out together. Truly, we had nothing to do. Nothing left to buy, nothing left (really) to organize. My family was scheduled to join us for a Christmas Eve reveillon but that really didn’t involve all that much preparation. It was a wonderfully warm day and there was fresh snow on the ground so after an early lunch we bundled the kids up and took them out to play in the snow. I really felt sorry for “southern” kids that they don’t get to play in snow. The neighbour (a 30-something year old little kid if there ever was one) was deeply involved with snow fort building and snowball fights on the front lawn. Kamryn joined his two girls and some other girls from the neighbourhood (it really was a girl power day). Kamryn, being the youngest, couldn’t quite keep up but she tried. In the end she decided she wanted to build a snowman, so I “helped” her and our youngest neighbour (4 ½) build a snowman. They abandoned me for more interesting pursuits before we had even put the bottom of the body in place but I made a really nice snowman on my own. Ah well.

Sam got right to work shoveling the driveway with Daniel. It’s good he’s getting the practice in now. I expect in years to come it will get hard to convince him of how much fun shoveling the driveway will be. If you put Sam down in “deep” snow he just stands there. Eventually he falls over and just lies there. Can’t say he is really impressed with it – smart boy! It’s a very effective way to slow down a little boy who NEVER stops moving. He is very happy in the driveway though and likes his shovel.

Sam and his shovel.



After naps and dinner the kids changed into jammies and we opened “birthfamily” presents (our little tradition; it’s a nice private time for us). Kamryn’s birthdad is a very generous man with no clue about children. :lol He gave Kamryn a digital camera (a real one albeit for children (8 and up!) and Sam a remote control car that we didn’t even bother taking out of the box because he would break it in an instant. There other presents (from other birthfamily members) were much more age appropriate – a Thomas the Train Lego set – that is a big hit except I’m sooooo tired of putting Thomas back together for Sam (I realized this morning that Kamryn can do it and she has been earning her big sister bonus points); Pjs and a robe for Kamryn; books etc. The kids joined in the first part of reveillon and then they were off to bed.

Sam opens a present from Nana:




Santa’s biggest Elf:



Christmas morning was wonderful. Santa left the toys for the children in the living room in front of the tree; doll paraphernalia for Kamryn who has been asking for a “carosse” (doll stroller) since October it seems, and a Little People Garage and a Dump Truck for Sam. I was a teensy bit worried there would be an argument over who the toys were for but they figured it out in an instant and while they both play with each others toys they know what belongs to who (Kamryn is at present lecturing Sam for messing up HIS Thomas the Train lego train tracks). Santa seems to have gotten things right though and there has been the least fighting this morning ever as they are too busy playing with their new toys to get in each other’s way.

Stocking unstuffing:




Kamryn models a new dress. Don’t know where she is going to wear this?!?



Kamryn helps her cousin distribute presents (Sam was asleep).



Today is the first real chance they have had to really play, as soon after opening presents we were off to Christmas Mass and then to my parents’ house to open up even more presents. It was all a little much for Sam and after opening one or two presents our little man needed to head off for his nap (he was just exhausted) so he opened his presents with Papa and Maman after everyone else. He enjoyed it just as much though. Kamryn had a ball helping to pass out presents to others and opening her own – sometimes she confused to two tasks. She had a wonderful day playing with her cousins and being spoiled, as did Sam.

Boxing Day morning we were off bright and early to Kingston to visit with our good friends on Wolfe Island. The kids got MORE presents and really enjoyed playing with Daniel (5) and Ella (3) the littlest family members. They also enjoyed a great deal more spoiling. Then it was back to Ottawa that night so that we could be here to share breakfast the next morning with Sam’s Godparents, Joe and Monica, who oddly we had just seen the day before on Wolfe Island but who had left for Ottawa to visit with Joe’s mother.

Today Daniel is back to work and the kids and I are just decompressing. Toys are being tried out and hopefully we will get the nap schedule back in order.

Wishing you all the best.

Vous souhaitant nos meilleurs voeux.

The T. Family

Look what I made. (If you click on it it gets bigger)

I'm redoing a picture book I wrote for Kamryn about her adoption. Technology has advanced beyond my original laminated pages. This will be the title page.

Weather Whines

I think like most Canadians I feel a certain pride by my ability to deal with the weather extremes we get here. In Eastern Ontario, we are lucky we REALLY get the extremes. Temperatures range yearly from –40 F (not counting windchill) to 107 F (not counting humidity and humidity is constant whether it’s hot or cold). We get snowstorms and ice storms and tornados (VERY rarely) and some impressive thunderstorms (no hurricanes thank god). So, it is not extremely hot all the time, nor is it extremely cold and I’ve never sat anxiously watching a hurricane approach but we get ALL the “normal” stuff.

I must admit that I whine as loudly as the next guy when it’s really hot BUT I feel so empowered the first time I take to the road and there is a foot of snow on the ground and it doesn’t phase me in the slightest. I smile quietly to myself as I deal with three-foot snowdrifts in the driveway and dispatch them quickly with the snow blower. Nothing makes you feel powerful like pushing around a 10 HP snow blower lol and nothing makes you feel as talented then hitting a patch of ice in the car and maintaining control of the automobile (the corollary being that nothing is more scary then losing control completely). We don’t have snow tires on our truck and it’s not four-wheel drive (we keep putting off buying snow tires cause winter hasn’t been all that bad the past two years).

I like waking up in the morning to a frigid house and feeling all warm and snuggly under the covers. I like winter camping although I haven’t done it in years. I like the cold rosy cheeks you getter spending time in the cold skating, sledding or just goofing off in the snow. I feel invulnerable when I fight my way into work; having waited in the cold for a bus bundled up like “Nanook of the North” and trudged down an icy sidewalk wondering if the feeling would ever return to my hands.

What gets me every time though is strapping an uncooperative kid into a car seat when it’s 7 F (okay I know that’s not all that cold but that just happens to be the temp today). You can’t do this with gloves on. They HAVE to come off. The kid is wearing 80 gazzillion layers so they aren’t exactly easy to get into the seat in the first place. So now you have a squishy, squirming, kid; snug car seat straps; and frozen hands. Did I mention said kid has kicked his boot and sock off so that his foot is potentially freezing as well and that your other child has taken off and is sure to be hit be a car at any moment because they aren’t being cooperative AT ALL. Ah…. Winter was easier in “bucket” days. I wish they made toddler sized buckets with special weight defying characteristics. Nope not feeling powerful, skilled or invulnerable at all today; just trying to find excuses to NEVER leave the house again or at least until May.

Okay my spirts are about to be reinvigorated. Just checked the weather forecast. Here is an excerpt:

A Major winter storm with the centre over western end of Lake Superior this morning is expected to bring heavy snowfall to regions just north of the lower Great Lakes and southeastern Ontario. The heavy snowfall has started over Windsor and Sarnia regions will reach Toronto and the Golden Horseshoe area by this evening then spread farther eastward to southeastern Ontario overnight. The heaviest snowfall is expected to occur along the Ontario Québec border Friday morning.

I can see Quebec from here.

Long time no real update

I have so much to update on and I just haven’t had the chance. I’ve been having some medical problems (unrelated to my descent into menopause) and have been to a gazillion doctors and had a trillion “procedures” in the last two weeks. I’m a little exhausted just thinking about it. It’s all a complication of a condition I’ve had for almost 20 years now and it has completely screwed up my right elbow. It’s gone from really serious to really annoying and has the potential to become moderately serious again but right now we’re happily wallowing in really annoying. :) I like annoying. Serious makes me worry. Okay enough about that – it is all intended as an excuse for my absence anyhow.

Well after 4 years I think we are finally done with social worker’s home visits. Not quite done with social workers yet as Sam’s adoption won’t be final for 6 months or so (if we are lucky) but no longer will I clean the house and bake something in anticipation of a report being written about me. All the reports are DONE! We had our last post placement visit for Sam last Friday, December 2nd. It went well as we knew it would. After working with someone for over 4 years on something as intimate as adoption, if your social worker hasn’t become a friend something is wrong.

I think back to when we were selecting a social worker to do our initial homestudy. I called all eight (staggering number) social workers in Ottawa and conducted phone interviews. I chose Carol because she was the one I thought I clicked with the best. It was a good choice. She really did well by us. She’s older and doddering and slow as molasses but you know she really cares and is doing the best she possibly can for you and for that I can over look her other foibles. I told her when she was leaving that if she ever needed us to speak at a workshop or something we would be happy to do it. I hope she takes us up on the offer. She brought up what a wealth of experience we were having done: a newborn domestic adoption, a toddler adoption, two different kinds of open adoptions, private adoption and a private adoption that involved the state and finally transracial adoption of sorts. I really do feel a little like an adoption expert now – at least in those areas. Carol is writing a book and will likely reference Sam’s adoption in it – complicated as it was. So we will likely hear from her on that too. I guess she’s not really out of our lives. We gave her a friendship ball as a little thank-you.

Other news, Kamryn’s birthfather is moving to Kenya. Sigh. He moves every few years. He’s a chef and he works for a major hotel chain so he goes where they need him. When Kamryn was born he was working in the U.A.E. then he was in Calgary and now he’s off to Kenya. I had hoped he would take another position in Canada because he’s not a Canadian citizen. He has to be in the country 3 years for that to happen and he never stays long enough. It would be a good thing for him to “take care of.” I guess this opportunity was too good for him to pass off though as it means “going home.” He’s Kenyan. He told us that we should start making vacation plans. Ummmm…. I don’t think so.

Now don’t get me wrong, a trip to Kenya would be the trip of a lifetime and we definitely plan on doing it one day but not with a 3 year old and a 1 year old. If we’re going to shell out for airfare to Kenya it’s going to be a trip that these kids remember. Our plan had been to go when Kamryn was around 10ish. He won’t be there that long but there is nothing to say he can’t go back. The company has 4 hotels there (one of which he will be responsible for opening). It will be odd having him so far away again (he’s been here since Kamryn was about a year old). I think he came back to work on his relationship with Kamryn’s birthmother. I know that relationship is over so I guess there really is nothing keeping him here. I hope he visits before he heads out. He is hoping to but it could be tough for him to coordinate.

Someone on Friends By Adoption asked what the difference was between bio and adopted kids – all this coordination and worrying about other people is the difference. It’s not all encompassing but it’s there. The kids, at the ages they are now are oblivious to it all but it’s an ongoing thing in our lives.

Okay that’s all the news that is fit to print today – must go feed the kids dinner they are getting VERY cranky.

Our First Gingerbread House

Okay the idea of doing anything creative terrifies me but Kamryn and I had fun. I think it turned out pretty good. Kamryn ate more than she decorated though. :lol

Getting started. I breathed a sigh of relief once the house was together and didn't fall apart immediately.

The finished product:

Our cookies. SHould I be embarassed that there is no descernible difference between the one I did and the one Kamryn did all by herself (I put the icing base down for her). :blush



Kamryn is VERY proud of her "dinosaur"*shrug* cookie:

Sometimes You Just Have to Listen

Sam is obsessed with two things in life: Balls and Cars. As such they were two of his first words. They were in english. Not a huge problem but we're really pushing french with him as he didn't have much french exposure before coming here. He is actually doing comparatively better than Kamryn was at his age (with me home with him he gets more french while Kamryn was with my very english parents quite a bit) but still we worry a little at how he will manage when he starts preschool next fall (I agonized over Kamryn too).

Anyway, we can't go anywhere without Sam pointing out each and every car or truck that he sees and yelling "Car!" So bad parents that we are rather than rejoicing in his burgeoning language skills we repeat endlessly "auto" (Ah- tow) and he yells back excitedly "Car! Car!" This is scene repeated each and every time we venture out of the house. So today I'm driving home and he's yelling at me "Maman! Tow! Tow! Tow!" at the top of his lungs and then I realized what he was saying and had to laugh. He'd pretty much been yelling it for 20 minutes and I just hadn't realized it. Daniel will be thrilled.

A few weeks ago I was considering having his speech tested because I was marginally concerned but in the last two weeks he's had the most noticable explosion. He's really RIGHT where he should be. I think I worry about his language mostly because we keep telling ourselves that if his language skills continue to be at or above average there is a chance that all the junk his birthmother was using didn't harm him. :(